theamazingamericanhero:

 

[Looks at him, pie and whip cream all over his face. Poses in his hero pose] Of course I did! For I am, Pie Man! 

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Which odd inventions are we talking about now. I have a lot of them. [You should let him join you for those pranks. LET HIM JOIN YOU BROTHER]

Does pie man require the use of my bathroom? [Watching a clump of pie that is about to fall off of Alfred’s nose.] 

That was the point I was trying to make. You having all sorts of odd little things. [You can join me, but if we get caught you will have to run. I prank them all-.]

"No Escape"

theamazingamericanhero:

fujoboka:

theamazingamericanhero:

Send me “No Escape” for my muse’s reaction to yours trapping them between their arms.

[chuckles] Hello, Mattie. I’m happy to see you, too. What can I do for you?~

What do you think you can do for me? [Maybe he just wants to hold you for a while. Maybe he thought about stealing you for a while. Just Maybe he was going to smooch all over your face and embarrass you. You’d never know he doesn’t plan things.] You’ve got a serious air about you today~. It’s sexy. [Yep Dark and sexy. Doesn’t stop him from ruffling his brother’s hair though.] 

I can do a lot of things. All depends on what you desire. [All of those sound great. Minus the trying to embarrass him thing] [Also yes he is flirting with you because he can] Well, duh. I would be worried if I wasn’t sexy. [This just makes him pout and huffs at him]

 Currently I desire…Roasting marshmallows over burning corpses. [Casually and easily ignores the flirting. Let’s it all slide off like water, because he knows better. Even if it was fun to tease back.] The day you’re no longer sexy is the day England’s eyebrows will rip themselves from his face to strangle France. 

theamazingamericanhero:

 

[Off he goes to counter and just. Smashes his face in the pie and eating it like that. Pie all over his face]

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You bet I can. ‘Cause I’m an AmeriCAN. Not AmeriCAN’T. [How is he going to mess people with them?]

[Covering his face as he’s fighting himself not to laugh. Instead his shoulders shake silently as he’s hiding a grin.] Oh pie man! You did it!


If you were an American’t then some of your…Odder inventions wouldn’t exist. That’d be a shame to humanity. [OH the usual. Dress up like Alfred ad trick them into thinking he’s Alfred only to mind fuck them and reveal he is actually Canada team rocket style. ]

"No Escape"

theamazingamericanhero:

Send me “No Escape” for my muse’s reaction to yours trapping them between their arms.

[chuckles] Hello, Mattie. I’m happy to see you, too. What can I do for you?~

What do you think you can do for me? [Maybe he just wants to hold you for a while. Maybe he thought about stealing you for a while. Just Maybe he was going to smooch all over your face and embarrass you. You’d never know he doesn’t plan things.] You’ve got a serious air about you today~. It’s sexy. [Yep Dark and sexy. Doesn’t stop him from ruffling his brother’s hair though.] 

theamazingamericanhero:

 

[gasps dramatically] The horror! [he lets go, wiggling to go and get that pie] Don’t worry civilian! I, the Pie Man, shall save you!

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They are. I can get you a pair. [pats him back just cause he can]

[Yes go save the poor pie. It needs you pie man. It needs you desperately. Loosing it’s will to stay flakey golden and delicious by each passing second. The horror!] It’s on the counter. 

Think you can find me an american flag one and one with my flag? [He’s going to mess with people. Perfect prank material.] 

nyehcromancer:

arinnhanson:

samswritingtips:

A breakdown of medieval armor, since a lot of pieces are required to create a full suit.

ref

Ref

huskdawgzilla:

superwholockgarfield:

because-donuts:

rokkstar:

Printing this and hanging it up in the laundry room ☺

tumblr has taught me more about real life than real life ever has

did i just learn a second language

I’ve been waiting for this for ages.

huskdawgzilla:

superwholockgarfield:

because-donuts:

rokkstar:

Printing this and hanging it up in the laundry room ☺

tumblr has taught me more about real life than real life ever has

did i just learn a second language

I’ve been waiting for this for ages.

theamazingamericanhero:

[hero voice] Don’t worry, citizen! I, Pie Man, shall save this poor pie for a horrible demise! I shall save the day! [Bear hug that lasts for a good minute or two]

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Thanks. [He had them custom made, because he is worth it. They hella comfortable.]

[Chuckles] Well you haven’t saved the day yet. That pie is still here and slowly decaying into a moldy death! [Aw yeah bear hug, let’s just squeeze you back.] 

They feel comfortable. [many paps for the pants.] 

beyouroffbeat:

frostmatey:

the-spinning-teacup:

iamonlyslightlydisneyobsessed:

Everyone always talks about how amazing of an architect Elsa is, but have we all forgotten about Tarzan’s parents who built an awesome tree house by themselves while caring for their infant child…?

TRUUUEEE

but someone had a headcanon that Tarzan’s parents were actually the King and Queen of Arendelle. They didn’t die, they washed up there

OHO 

OHOHOHOHO

theamazingamericanhero:

fujoboka:

Oh whatever shall I do, I baked this pie, but I can’t find my brother to give it to. It will grow old and get all moldy. Someone save this poor pie. *All dramatic.* It needs a hero!

[CRASHES IN THROUGH DOOR]

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MATTIE NO! DON’T LET THAT PIE GET OLD AND MOLDY!! [holds him and shakes] NOT OLD AND MOLDY!! [gives bear hug because he missed you]

[Holds wrist to forehead.] I can’t eat the pie all by myself! You’ll have to do it Alfie! Don’t let it die old and moldy! It needs you to eat it! Save it from this existence! [Aw yeah a bear hug this is awesome.] 

Nice pants.  [Pokes them, because where’d you get those from? They look comfortable.]